James Donaldson on Mental Health - Why Kids Lie and What Parents Can Do About It

Ways to help your kids avoid lying in the first place Let them know the truth reduces consequences For instance, if teens have been drinking at a party, the parent will want them to call to be picked up.

But kids know there also has to be a consequence for the drinking.

“There’s a hard balance to strike between having the open dialogue but also setting appropriate limits when necessary,” Dr.

In this situation, where lying would have been easier, when parents are doling out the consequence they can also praise the child for telling the truth and tell them it makes them more trustworthy.

They might also reduce the consequence, such as letting kids know they’re taking their phone away for a day instead of a week.

Rouse adds one caveat: Children and teens should not think consequences are negotiable.

“Sometimes the kid will say, ‘But I told you the truth,’” he says.

“They’ll get manipulative, saying, ‘This is just making me want to never tell the truth again.’” Parents shouldn’t give in at that point.

Use truth checks Let’s say parents have been told by a teacher their child didn’t do their homework.

Brady suggests that they give their kid a chance to tell the truth.